Netland Towers Library: Three Arches

Three Arches
by Lydia Al'Neary

> Her father's eyes twinkled in the same shade of amber brown she herself had. He was laughing...hearty and robust. He sat with her braiding flowers to make her a wreath fit for a princess and they were singing his favorite song. "Your mother sang this all the time and we'd dance. You are so much like her." She loved when he spoke of the mother she never knew. Those beautiful moments were so rare that she treasured every one, more precious than the crown of Andor itself.

Click...Click...Click....

She looked around her room. "What is that?" Her father looked at her confused. "What, my dear?”

Click...Click...Click

She went to the door and opened. "There it is again!" She saw nothing outside the door.

The dream started to escape back into the recesses of her subconscious. The steady click...click...click...was separating itself from the diminishing dream. Lydia growled into her pillow trying to burrow herself under the warm blanket. What chore could someone possibly be doing at this hour? As the clicking grew closer to her room and became increasingly loud she rolled over with a frustrated groan and hurled her pillow in the general direction of her door. The door slammed open with a bang and the pillow landed squarely at the feet of an Aes Sedai. The residue of sleep immediately dissipated as Lydia almost fell out of the small bed in an effort to get to her feet and make a less than graceful curtsey. As she rose and looked at the woman before her, Lydia's amber tinted eyes widened. What in the Light....?

Jascha Sedai's golden eyes gleamed in the darkness, her wooden wolf headed cane's tapered end coming to rest on Lydia's pillow. The novice could not for the life of her imagine what brought the ancient Aes Sedai to her this night. "Come on child. It is time." Jascha Sedai turned her back on the girl and began her way back down the hall. Click…Click…Click… Lydia did not even have enough time to pull a robe over her shift. She felt the damp chill in the air crawl over her skin, but did not hesitate to follow the woman. Time? She cannot possible mean what I think she means. Was not Lacy Sedai supposed to come for me? I am too young. I have only been a novice for three years. I am not ready for this. Oh, Creator....am I really to be tested? She had a million questions to ask Jascha Sedai running through her head, but the Aes Sedai walked with purpose and somehow the novice felt it inappropriate to even speak. The two walked on and on through the Tower, an ancient who had stood the test of time and a child yet to be tested. Lydia began not recognizing the halls and stairwells they weaved through, up and down and doubted she could even find her way back on her own.

The novice's heart pounded so loud it rung in her ears when the Aes Sedai finally stopped and opened a door. There it was in the center of the chamber. The ter'angreal Lydia had only dreamed about. Three arches gleaming silver with an Aes Sedai seated at each connection. The girl recognized one of them as her own mentor, Jade Sedai. There also stood the Mistress of Novices, Lacy Sedai, with three chalices. Jascha Sedai turned to Lydia as they prepared to enter the room. "Lydia, I am going to tell you two things no woman hears until they are standing where you are now. First...once you start you must finish. If you do not, despite your potential, you will be put out from the Tower. You will receive enough silver for one year and you will never be allowed to return. Second...there is danger in these arches. There have been women who have entered and never come out. When it grew quiet they...were...not...there. They were simply gone and have never been seen again. You must be steadfast, Lydia. The way will come but once. This is your chance not to enter. You may refuse right now and yet receive two more chances. If you refuse a third time you will be sent from the tower. There is no shame in refusing, girl. Many cannot face the arches the first time."

"No, I am ready Aes Sedai," Lydia said without hesitation surprising herself, as she let out the breath she had not realized she had been holding. Jascha Sedai led her deeper into the chamber as the arches came to life glowing with their purpose.

Lacy Sedai spoke emotionless words which had been spoken in this room countless times before. "Whom do you bring with you sister?"

Jascha replied automatically, "One who comes as a candidate for Acceptance, Sister."

"Is she ready?"

"She is ready to leave behind what she was, and, passing through her fears, gain Acceptance." "Does she know her fears?" "She has never faced them, but is now willing" "Then let her face what she fears."

Jascha Sedai looked to Lydia indicating her shift with her golden eyes. Perspiration rose on the novice's skin and she shook slightly with the realization of what she was to do. She lifted the shift up over her head and let her waist length curls cascade down her back. I will not be ashamed. Her shift dropped to the cold floor.

Jascha spoke to her again. "The first arch is for what was. Remember, the way will come but once. Be steadfast." Lydia nodded as she stepped into the soft glow of the first of the arches. **********************************************************************************

Lydia sat wrapped in the warmth of strong arms as the chill autumn breeze rolled over her skin. Being the blacksmith's apprentice had certainly worked wonders for Maven's shoulders. She sighed with the sadness that washed over her like the wind. The awareness of what she had done to him was constantly in the forefront of her mind. She felt awful and the guilt was almost unbearable. Since the night she had made him promise never to leave Whitebridge he had not, not even to go to the next village over. In that moment she really wanted them to be together forever. Now here she was preparing to leave him. She could not even bring herself to say goodbye. She knew she should. He deserved an explanation, but how could she after what she had done? She wasn't even sure exactly what it was she had done. I am going to leave him to rot in Whitebridge while I go off to live my life...to become Aes Sedai. She turned to Maven and the man she had loved her entire life was looking at her with brown eyes as deep as pools.

"Marry me Lydia. Be my wife and stay here with me forever. Please do not ever let me go." Tears welled in her eyes. Light! It is as if he knows. How can I leave him? I do love him. I always have. He would not hurt me on purpose like this. She knew she must stay. She would just go to the Aes Sedai and tell her she had changed her mind. She would not be going to the White Tower. She turned and threw her arms around his neck laughing and kissing him deeply. "So is this yes?" he asked joining in her laughter. "Yes! Maven, yes!" The two became as one as they got lost in each other's kisses.

"Lydia, it is time." The two lovers pulled apart breathlessly at the sound of a third voice. The girl's heart leapt into her throat recognizing the Aes Sedai's voice.

"Time? Time for what?" Maven looked to the woman in confusion? The Aes Sedai did not address him, but Lydia directly. "You have not told him. Tell him now quickly. We must go."

Lydia gathered her courage. "No. I am staying. We are going to be married. I cannot leave him."

"You must go. I have already explained to you the consequences that will occur if you don't. You are less good to him dead." The Aes Sedai's gray eyes glinted like steel.

Lydia could see the anger boiling in Maven. "She is not going anywhere! She will never leave me! She is not dying! What? Are you going to kill her for staying?! I'll see you dead first."

"Stand down boy or you will get hurt." The woman appeared completely calm. "Come Lydia!" Lydia started towards the Aes Sedai.

"Lydia!" The pain in Maven's voice ripped through her and she stopped. She stood between the two knowing she must go and not wanting to leave. She had to explain.

The way will come but once, be steadfast.

An arch glowed just past the Aes Sedai. Lydia could not remember why, but knew she must walk through it. The Aes Sedai smiled and nodded at her slightly. The girl turned back briefly to the confused young man. "I am sorry, my love. I promise someday I will fix this." She ran past the Aes Sedai, tears flowing, through the arch. **********************************************************************************

Lydia found herself almost running into the Mistress of Novices as she flew out of the arch. She sobbed." Why? Why did I have to leave him that way again? I just left him and he is stuck!"

Lydia felt numb as Lacy Sedai poured the first ice cold chalice of water over her bare skin and spoke. "You are washed clean of what sin you have done, and of those done against you. You are washed clean of what crime you may have committed, and of those committed against you. You come to us washed clean and pure, in heart and soul."

Lydia looked with doubt in her eyes at the second arch. I cannot do this. I was not ready for this. She knew at eighteen she was young to be going through this test and she seriously felt as if she should have taken the opportunity to refuse. It is too late. There is no turning back for me now or else it is over for me. The girl steadied her breathing and allowed calmness to reclaim her. Jascha took her to the glowing arch. "The second arch is for what is. The way will come but once. Be steadfast." Lydia gingerly stepped through the second arch. ****************************************************************************************************************

The warm breeze teased Lydia's curls and she closed her eyes to enjoy the feel of it. She was sitting under her and Diz's tree in the gardens, banded dress of an Accepted pooling under her. She sighed missing him. He had been gone fighting the shadow for months now and it seemed he would never return. She felt the sun turn to shade with someone's approach. The sight of the man in black with the sun behind him standing before her as her eyes opened caused her heart to leap just for a moment until she realized who it was there before her. She tried to keep the emotion from showing and smiled warmly. The soldier in front of her had become a constant companion and good friend. He did not cause the loss of senses kind of love Diz had, but her affection for him was genuine. She smiled warmly and patted the soft grass next to her, indicating for him to sit with her.

"Acton! It's good to see you." His face beamed at her and she almost giggled. She thought back on when they first met and how shy he had been stumbling over his words and showing her his creations. Since he had given her that useless hairpin that grew her already waist length hair another inch, she had been helping him figure out what everything did and they had been keeping a log. He sat next to her pulling something out of his multitude of pockets. "You too, Lyd!" Lydia smiled wryly, "What have you brought me today, my inventor?" His eyes sparkled. "Close your eyes and hold out your hand." Rolling her eyes, she did what he asked. She felt something gently placed on the palm of her hand. It was so light she may not have known it was there except for Acton's fingers brushing her own. "Alright...open them." She could hear the anticipation in his voice.

She opened her eyes and what she saw there took her breath away. Sitting in her palm was the perfect replica of a butterfly. It was tiny and exquisite. Lydia thought had a real version of the gentle creature landed in her hand next to this one she would not have been able to tell them apart. Wide-eyed she looked up at him. "Aside from your staff this is the most amazing thing I've seen you make. You did make this?” she asked. She had not imagined he was capable of something like this. "Yes, I copied it. I've been working on it for months," he replied. "What does it do?" she asked with excitement. "Well, you see it's a complex weave of spirit, woven in on itself with a touch of fire and earth. That earth is a way to stabilize the entire mixture. The truly odd thing is that there is a third and final layer of spirit that just didn't want to hold. It felt like it was on a spring waiting to be unleashed." Acton rambled on. Lydia laughed and actually had to cover up his mouth to get him to stop talking. "ACTON! WHAT- DOES- IT -DO?"Mmm....hmmm…omm..." Lydia uncovered his mouth. "I don't know. I can't make it do anything. I've tried every combination I can think of. I was thinking...maybe only a woman can use it, so I brought it to you. See here. There is a small hollow between the eyes." Lydia smiled, "If I can make it work can I keep it?" Acton looked at her with a pained expression. "I...I guess so." She laughed ruffling his hair, "I’m just kidding!"

Lydia set the butterfly on the ground between them. "Well, Acton, let's see what we have here." "Here's hoping we don't blow anything up." Acton laughed. The two knew they were playing with fire, but the two of them together had never been burned. He thought of her as a lucky charm. "Maybe I can make it fly..." Lydia began by channeling a small stream of air which accomplished nothing. One by one she channeled water, earth, and fire and the little butterfly did not stir. "One more. Then we should try it together. If that doesn't work I'll start combinations." She channeled just a thin thread of spirit into the hollow and stared in disbelief as the ter'angreal started to glow, tiny wings starting to move, and the stream of saidar shot out into Acton's chest.

There was a look of confusion on the black coated boy's face. The beam didn't feel like it hurt but it did something. He immediately reached down to check his chest...nothing physical wrong. That was good. Acton tilted his head looking at the butterfly, "Well, I think we are on the right track with the use of spirit, but I guess it was missing something. Here...let’s try it together this time. Do you remember how to link?" Lydia smiled and nodded. She once again opened herself to the sweetness of saidar and waited for Acton to prepare to link with her.

Acton closed his eyes for a moment, calming his mind and forming the void deep within himself. It came easily now and sprung up around him. He was alone in there. Not even the tingle of the woman channeling so close reached him there. That was odd. Normally he felt it no matter how deep he was. He could feel more then see the glowing mass of seething energy that was saidin and reached out to seize it. Nothing happened. He reached again, lunging for the One Power and it did not move. Lydia looked questioningly at the boy. It did not usually take him this long.

Gritting his teeth he tried to force it, using all his knowledge in how to tame the unruly beast that was saidin but nothing happened. It was just there... watching. "LYDIA! I-I...Oh light... I... I can't t-t-touch it! LIGHT! I can't touch it!" Acton was almost frantic then, the rest of the words made no sense, just an incoherent babble of weave patterns trying to figure out what happened. It was obvious to anyone who knew the signs...he had been gentled.

All the breath rushed out of the Accepted's lungs. "Acton? Acton? Are you sure?" She stared at the ground speaking at almost a whisper. He gave no response. He just kept trying to figure out what happened and trying in vain to reach the source. "What have we done?" Tears came to her eyes as she crawled over to him. He just kept babbling as she held him. She wiped her tears away and steeled herself. "I can fix this. I know I can." Still holding him she closed her eyes, embraced and cleared her mind struggling to recall the weave she had read but not actually seen. The flows started to form in her mind as her hands wove the threads. She was about to start delving him...

The way will come but once…

Her eyes snapped open. “No!" She looked up and almost directly in front of them a stood a shimmering gateway. She ignored it, closed her eyes once again and began feeling. "HA! There it is. I know I can do this!" She could feel the split and the threads she needed to put back together. Acton started to come out of his daze. "W-What are you doing? C-can you really fix it?" She replied, "I think so. Now shh...I have to concentrate." It came again...

Be steadfast… "Son of a motherless trolloc!" She knew she must leave him there. She sighed overcome with sadness. She let go of the source and hugged him close whispering. "I'm sorry...I'm so very sorry. This will not happen." Letting him go she stood. " Lydia...Lydia...what are you doing? Fix me...please!" He looked at her terror-stricken. She walked toward the gateway without looking back. "LYDIA! PLEASE!" She started trembling. ****************************************************************************************************************

She stepped through the gateway with her eyes closed. She opened them pain and hatred flaring for herself and the Tower. "Am I always destined to do this to people?" Lydia shuddered as Lacy Sedai poured the second chalice over her head and spoke. "You are washed clean of false pride. You are washed clean of false ambition. You come to us washed clean, in heart and soul." Jascha Sedai led Lydia to the final arch. "This arch is what will be. The way will come but once. Be steadfast." The girl just stood there staring at the shimmering light. She shook her head. "What Creator forsaken deed awaits me here? I..." She started to say she could not continue. She almost turned around, took her silver and walked away from the Tower forever. Almost...

Lydia walked stoically into the arch.

********************************************************************************** The way will come but once. Be steadfast…

"What the…?" Lydia looked around confused and disoriented. Looking down she saw the stole of the keeper about her shoulders colored yellow. I am the keeper but what am I doing here? She came to realize she was in the office of the Amyrlin Seat decorated in what seemed to be Saldean style. Suddenly, it all came flooding back to her. Alex, the Saldean who had been a friend as a novice and later as Accepted, was the recently appointed Amyrlin and she, Lydia, was the Keeper.

Lydia looked down feeling more than seeing the red at first. She could feel it cling to her stole, to her dress, to her feet. It was glorious. Almost lost in the moment her eyes swam with rapture at the scene before her, taking a deep breath not wanting to loose a moment. She laughed then. "I have done it my love. I have removed her for you. Are you not proud?" She looked down at the ruby ring, as crimson as the blood on her hands, suppressing a shiver at the memory it brought forth. The woman stroked it fondly, almost seeing the reflection of the man all this was for. "I know you are watching. You always love to watch."

She knelt down in the blood slowly pouring from the body and creeping across the floor. She looked panicked for a moment. No! Must not waste it! The thought rang in her head, almost not feeling like her own, as she looked for the empty wine bottle she had shared in celebration first with him and then with her not to long before. With a quick flick of air, she captured the blood and funneled it into the long bottle. Her eyes skimmed over the fallen form. "You deserved it, you know? If you had done what he said, I wouldn't have had to. You chose death yourself by denying him. You did not know I was his, did you? Ha! No, of course not. This would not have been so easy if you had. You just let me get so close. We would have been so good to you, precious." Lydia caressed the face of the lifeless Amyrlin. She stood and wiped as much of the blood off of her as she could with the Alex's shawl and began to giggle. "Maybe I'll just take this with me. What do you say, Alex? Nothing anymore, I guess. Would it not be lovely if I were next in your place? It is a shame I cannot stay and see their faces when they find you. "Lydia collected the jeweled dagger she had used to slice her friend's throat, wrapped it in the soiled shawl and looked to the wall behind the Amyrlin's desk. There was a rippling opening making the wall appear torn open. He had not let her down. The man stood, dark and gorgeous, his perfect white coat hanging about him. It was like a beacon in the sea of red. The smile he held for her did not touch his eyes, those almost crystalline orbs, the same orbs she had been lost in so many times. She could not shake the feeling that something else stirred within those eyes but she could not place it. Wordlessly the white coated man raised his arm up and extended his hand. Her heart leapt for joy and, clutching the bottle to her chest, she went to him. Grasping his hand, she stepped into the dream world. He leaned down kissing her cheek where Alex's blood still lingered and her body trembled.

"You have done well Kitten." He spoke softly to her, placing one finger under her chin to bring her down cast eyes to meet his own. He held her there for a moment before encircling an arm around her waist. "Thank you Master," she spoke, words coming breathless now. She had pleased him. Her heart could soar with such a feeling.

Lydia stood on her toes now, wondering if she had earned a kiss from her beloved master. It was the only thing she could think of… the feel of his lips… the taste of his...

The way will come but once…

No… that isn't what she thought. She shook her head. Where did it come from? She turned her mouth up to his again, closing her eyes. She had earned this much.

…be steadfast.

There! That voice again. Where was it coming from? Whose was it? She pulled back confused, looking around. The once shimmering gateway was now a glowing silver arch.

"Kitten? Do you not wish to come to me?" The white coated man's voice was commanding, with a touch of concern. She went to go back to him, wanting nothing more then the comfort of his embrace and for him to smile. There was something else… it called to her, pulling her mind out of the fog. The same voice more familiar echoed in the room.

The way will come but once! Be steadfast!

NO! Not now! I am so close! Lydia almost wanted to scream out with frustration. She looked up at him. She could see the pain in his eyes making each step more difficult then the last. The world seemed much heavier then, forcing her down to the ground crawling on all fours to the silver archway.

********************************************************************************** Lydia collapsed onto the cold floor and she crawled out of the arch. She was still speechless. Her eyes were haunted. She screamed inside her head. No! I will not. I will not do that! Never! Not to Alex, not to anyone! I will remember him and run if I ever see him! How could I let someone do that to me! Who is he?

"Get up child," Lydia heard Jascha's voce break through the torment in her head. The girl started to regain her senses and rose and saw the room now full of Aes Sedai. She recognized some…Mordelaine Sedai….Nefer Sedai…Tamika Sedai…Aifa Sedai…several others of every Ajah. Hardly realizing it she came to kneel before the Amyrlin. The sight made her heart ache with memory of what she had just seen…done. Jendaia Sedai poured the third chalice over her head and Lydia felt the darkness lift from her. She was sure the memory would haunt her dreams until the end of her days.

"You are washed clean of Lydia Al'Neary from Whitebridge. You are washed clean of all ties that bind you to the world. You come to us washed clean, in heart and soul. You are Lydia Al'Neary, Accepted of the White Tower. You are sealed to us." She placed the Great Serpent Ring on the third finger of Lydia's left hand and bringing the new Accepted to her feet embraced her.