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The Three Arches by Ameline Ebera Ameline could not remember the walk down to the testing hall. She could not even recall the details of being summoned. As soon as the Mistress of Novices had approached her in the Novices' dining hall at breakfast and issued the summons to be tested, Ameline's mind had been a turmoil of emotions. She was not ready! She had only been in the tower for little over 4 years and could not be ready. What were they playing at? However her mind raced, Ameline had followed---had no choice but to follow. Now they stood before the great wooden doors down in the underground levels of the Tower and the Mistress of Novices was speaking. Trying to pull herself together and focus, Ameline listened. “I will tell you two things that no Novice hears until she stands here,” the Mistress of Novices explained gravely but not unkindly. “Once you begin, you must go on to the end. Refuse and you will be put out of the Tower, with enough silver to last a year.” The Mistress of Novices paused for a moment to let the information sink in before continuing. “Second, to seek, to strive, is to know danger. Some girls enter the ter'angreal and, when the arches grew quiet, they were not there. If you will survive, you must be steadfast. Falter, fail, and....... This is your last chance. Refuse now and it counts only as the first. Choose.” Ameline looked through the double doors into the great domed chamber that held the silvery, shimmering Arches. She thought that however much she would like to wait, it would likely not be any easier to face her fears if she refused and came back another time. True, she might know more, might be stronger, but from what she had learned in lessons, none of that would matter during her test. Yes. Better to do it now and get it over with. Squaring her shoulders, she met the Mistress of Novices' eyes. “I accept.” Her voice did not quaver, despite her nerves, for which she was glad. At her assent, the Mistress of Novices nodded and said “good” before entering. As they walked through the threshold, a Blue sister began the formalities. “Whom do you bring with you, Sister?” “One who comes as a candidate for Acceptance, Sister.” “Is she ready?” “She is ready to leave behind what she was, and, passing through her fears, gain Acceptance.” “Does she know her fears?” “She has never faced them, but is now willing.” “Then let her face what she fears.” Mechanically remembering her lessons on the protocol of the ceremony, Ameline undressed, folded her clothing and piled it neatly. Finally, she kicked of her slippers and moved towards the arches. Her heart was pounding frantically The Mistress of Novices positioned her in front of one Arch and said: “The first time is for what was. The way will come but once. Be steadfast.” With a deep breath, Ameline stepped through the light.........and found herself stumbling in the semi-dark of a cellar. Where am I? Ameline wondered. Tripping over what seemed to be a wine cask, Ameline barely caught herself before falling face first onto the rough ground. Brushing off her woolen skirts—Skirts? Wasn't I just naked? No, that would be ridiculous —Ameline squinted to see her surroundings and recognized the shadowy outline of stairs. Feeling her way to the stairs, she climbed to the door, wincing as she stubbed her toes. Gaining the landing, Ameline groped for the handle and turned it, only to find that it was locked. She jiggled it a few times, testing that it wasn't just jammed. Though the door a loud voice bellowed, “You stop that now. You'll come out when we're ready and not before.” Jumping, Ameline called back in confusion, “Hello? Hello! Why am I in here? Let me out!” But she received no answer. Mind racing, Ameline tried to remember what was going on, why she would be locked away like a criminal. She could not recall what she had done: in fact, she could not remember anything recent. What is happening? Why can't I remember why I'm here? Minutes that felt like hours later, Ameline heard loud footsteps and backed away from the door. An imposing man dressed in all white came through and before she could stop him, grabbed her upper arm and began dragging her along. Out in the light, Ameline saw that she was in the Lace Fan, her village's only Inn. Attempting to pull away from the man's vice-like grip, Ameline yelled that he had no right to treat her in that manner. “The Light has no mercy for Witches,” he snarled in reply. Witches? Ameline thought. Isn't that what they call Aes Sedai? The fragmented knowledge caused even more confusion than the amnesia. Who call Aes Sedai witches? Why would they say I'm one—I'm no Aes Sedai! Ameline wondered why she her last thought felt only partially true. Outside, Ameline faltered when she saw an enormous gallows standing in the square. It seemed the whole village was standing around just watching, just waiting—never helping or even looking in her direction. Spying her parents through the crowd, Ameline screamed, “Mother! Father! Help me, please....what's happening?” They did not reply, but gazed back at their daughter dejectedly. They were surrounded by more men—Whitecloaks, Ameline realized. But Whitecloaks have no jurisdiction here, Ameline thought. Along with her parents, Ameline was led to the gallows where another Whitecloak pronounced in a commanding voice: “Ameline Ebara. You are found guilty of channeling the One Power, resulting in the murder of Katian Mashere. For this crime, you will be hung until dead. For aiding and abetting your crimes, your parents, Alan Ebara and Anella Ebara will share in your sentence.” Wondering if this was some kind of trick, Ameline looked around for someone to call “halt” or “stop” or make any sort of protest. She could not remember channeling—as far as she knew she could not channel. Searching her memory, the last thing she could recall was being beaten up by Katian and her gang before a tree exploded in the cold. Surely none had been hurt; well, none other than herself. The Whitecloaks began to fasten nooses around her parent's necks before approaching Ameline. The way back will come but once. Be steadfast. Not her own thoughts, they nevertheless reverberated through her mind, prompting her to action. As the Whitecloak came near, Ameline kicked him hard and began to run. Behind her, Ameline heard shouts of anger and above that, the voices of her parents urging her on. With no planned direction, Ameline ran on until in the side of a small house, she saw a silvery glowing arch. Not really knowing why, Ameline was just about to hurl herself through, when the loud crack and snap of the gallows's trap door halted her. Turning, Ameline froze for a moment. In that moment, she felt a sharp stabbing in her right shoulder and looked down to see the shaft and fletchings of an arrow protruding from her body. She stumbled back in shock and pain, falling through the arch, screaming her denial of what was happening. ----------------- Memory of pain, memory of failure crashed over Ameline as cold clear water spilled on her head. The arrow was gone, but blood still ran down her arm from a coin-size hole in her shoulder. “You are washed clean of what sin you may have done and those done against you. You are cleaned of what crime you may have committed, and those committed against you. You come to us washed clean and pure, in heart and soul.” Ameline did not cry. She was too horrified by what had happened to feel anything but shock. The Mistress of Novices saw the wound and was startled—enough for it to show plainly on her face. “How? But no, do not answer. You must continue.” She led Ameline to the second arch and said with voice full of empathy: “The second time is for what is. The way will come but once... be steadfast.” Tripping to the arch, Ameline went through the light.......and found herself sitting on the bed in her room. She knew it was her room, but it felt odd. She fingered the banded dress of the Accepted and wondered why it felt odd too; no woman would be allowed to wear the banded dress unless she had passed the test. Have I passed the test? I should be able to remember going through the arches... A throbbing pain ached in her right arm, but she paid it no mind. She knew she was to wait, but for what? Just then, the door opened and Ameline rose to curtsy to the Mistress of Novices, who was flanked by one sister from each Ajah. “You are summoned to appear before the Hall of the Tower to answer for your crimes.” Utterly confused, Ameline instinctually felt for the source and felt a wall blocking her way. I am shielded! A sense of hopelessness filled Ameline as she was forced to follow the Mistress of Novices through the halls, dread mounting the higher they went. The way back will come but once. Be steadfast. The thought was not her own, but it strengthened her resolve to face whatever came her way. She fleetingly thought of trying to run, but knew it would be useless. They approached the magnificent doors to the Hall of the Tower, which swung wide to show a formal session already in progress. Grave, ageless faces glared at Ameline, judging her for her sins. Ameline hesitated before being pushed with flows of air into the Hall. The Amyrlin spoke as soon as Ameline had kneeled before her, “Ameline Ebara, you were caught breaking into the Holding with the obvious intent to steal tower property and use it for malicious purposes. For this crime of treason against the Tower, you will be Stilled and sent away forever. This matter will be concluded immediately in the Traitor's Court.” Ameline felt as though someone had punched her in the stomach. Stilled? But I never stole anything! She could vaguely remember being in the Holding; Madienne had let her in there to search for clues during their challenge, but that was long ago when she was still a novice. Still a novice? Why do I have the feeling that I am still a novice? Why was she being tried now? She said nothing, hoping that if she kept silent, her friend would not be implicated in the matter. Technically, Ameline was the one who had trespassed, not Madienne, but she did not think the Hall would differentiate in the matter. The escort led her out of the tower, towards her doom. Struggling, Ameline fought against her shield to no avail. She wasn't strong enough to break through a shield and probably wouldn't be able to do anything useful against full Sisters even if she could channel. In a desperate attempt to save herself, she turned and swung her fist into the Mistress of Novices' face, knocking her down. As she did, her shield miraculously dissipated—only one had been holding it, thank the light. She embraced the source to near breaking point and ran. Not really knowing where she was going, Ameline rushed past novices and Accepted, servants and sisters, head-long into a group of Aes Sedai escorting Madienne. Oh light, they got her too! Ameline thought. Channeling, she attempted to weave flows of air around the sisters' feet, knocking them off balance, but they blocked her flows with ease. The rush of power flowing through Ameline was cut off abruptly as one of the Aes Sedai slammed a shield into place. Ameline staggered from the force. “Run, Madienne!” Ameline shouted. She was just about to do whatever it took to allow her friend to escape, when she saw a silvery glowing arch out the corner of her eye. No. Not now. I can't! Ameline thought frantically. The sisters were closing in on Ameline, making to surround her as well as Madienne. She had no choice but to escape. “I'm sorry Madi. Light, I'm so sorry.” She turned and fled through the searing light, screaming in frustration and remorse. ----------- “You are washed clean of false pride. You are washed clean of false ambition. You come to us washed clean, in heart and soul.” Ameline stared dazedly ahead as the water poured over her head. Pain stabbed her shoulder and memories of her desertion wracked her mind. She would not cry over herself—she was more disgusted and ashamed of her actions than sad. “How could I? Am I that terrible? I was no better than... than... I'm not, am I?” The last question was for the Mistress of Novices who looked sadly down at Ameline. “All who come through here ask that question. There is a price to be Accepted.” I don't want to be accepted if it means failing my friends and family over and over again. Helping Ameline to her feet, she continued. “You are almost finished and we must continue. The third arch is for what will be. The way will come but once. Be steadfast.” She stared at the arch and wondered what atrocities she would commit this time. Who she would abandon. Who she would hurt. In horror, she threw herself though the light, daring it to do it's worst...... Sitting on the rough dusty ground, Ameline Ebara Aes Sedai looked up from her dead warder and howled: letting out all her sorrow and pain in one long cry of suffering. Any who heard would have been chilled to the bone, but none were around save Ameline and the man lying on the ground before her. She knew they had been bonded for years, decades—though for some reason she could not remember it all; now he was gone, murdered by a darkfriend Asha'man. How had she allowed this to happen? She could not even remember a fight, she could not remember anything. But she must have been too slow, too late or he would still be alive. She cursed her slowness, her ineptitude. The way back will come but once. Be steadfast. Ameline looked up for a moment, wondering where the statement had come from, for it had not been her thought. Steadfast? To be Aes Sedai is to be steadfast. Ameline thought, a little confused. I will be steadfast. Prying herself off her warder—No, he's my Gaidin no longer. He's gone.—Ameline stood and an icy calm settled about her like a cloak. She would revenge him if it took all her long years to do so. Turning her her horse, Ameline stopped dead when she saw a second man, dressed all in black, shielded and wrapped head to foot in bonds of Air. How? Rubbing her forehead, Ameline thought that the shock of the bond breaking must have caused the lapse in memory, for here stood the murderer: ready and at her disposal to exact her revenge. A frightening smile that did not touch her eyes spread across Ameline's face. “I will end your life Darkfriend,” she spat at him contemptuously, “but not before I make you wish you were never born.” She began to weave: flows to hit, pinch and sting, flows to heat his blood, flows to cause pain in any manner possible—flows she didn't even know until she made them. Using the power as a weapon was forbidden, but Ameline did not think of this as an attack, but justice. She took no pleasure from the Darkfriend's screams, she felt no thrill at causing pain—she acted with a distaste for her actions, knowing that at times you did what you must and paid the price later. A silvery arch appeared behind the man, beckoning to Ameline. She tried to ignore it's pull and focus on her task, to no avail. “I will not go. I must finish this first. I swore I would finish this!” Ameline spoke out loud, causing the darkfriend to look at her peculiarly. For some reason, but not knowing how, she knew that if she left, the darkfriend would go free. Be steadfast. The silent prompt echoed in her mind, urging her, pulling her away from what she knew she wanted. Screaming in rage, Ameline tied off the flows and threw herself past the darkfriend through the arch. ---------------- Light stung Ameline, burned her to the core. Cold water flowed for a third time over her head as she fell to her knees, dry sobs wracking her body. Still, after all she had seen, all she had done, no tear came—perhaps would never come. “You are washed clean of Ameline Ebara of Saldea. You are washed clean of all ties that bind you to the world. You come to us washed clean, in heart and soul. You are Ameline Ebara, Accepted of the White Tower.” The Amyrlin slipped the golden ring onto Ameline's finger, saying: “Welcome daughter.” Ameline wanted to throw the ring, hurl it at the Amyrlin's face and run, but she knew that was not possible. She knew that for good or bad, she was sealed to the White Tower. She was Accepted—though she would never accept what had happened, what she had done in the arches. One of the Sisters offered healing to Ameline and the cold washed through her body, but it was just a fraction of the cold that had settled into her heart. Ameline Ebara walked away a different girl, a harder girl—a woman who knew the darkest depths of her soul and was determined to never let them see the light of day |
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